Right so

This is what I wore on New Year’s Eve!

It was pretty out of my comfort zone for several years: clashing patterns, my boobs were visibly lower than many ladies’ like, and more visible than most people are ok with in the first place, I was wearing the skirt as like… a jumper skirt, and I also drank enough wine that the skirt came off to reveal hotpants (not pictured!)

As soon as one of my sisters saw this online, she told me to “burn that skirt”. My little sister said, “You looked ok, except your back…?” (“My back fat?” I offered). “NO NOT FAT. I didn’t say fat! You said fat!” Yes, yes I did. Sometimes I get so safe and comfy-warm in my internet cocoon that I forget how susceptible everyone around me is to self-criticism, which then extends itself to outside criticism. My back fat was fine. My visible, sort of low-hanging boobs were fine. It was a fun outfit! I also get tired of being told I can ever be cute, and not sexy.

Sometimes I also just want to be an eyesore and not cute or sexy, because I’d rather be offensive than boring or fitting too tightly into the fat lady infantilization or oversexualization boxes. I usually set up a pretty permanent camp in the former box.

THE SKIRT HAS FUCKING MALE ACROBATS ON IT YEAH RIGHT I’D SOONER BURN MY SISTER THAN THIS SKIRT:

Oh my god

Fancy hair! Easy to do: Put hair up in a ponytail with a “bump” in front. Curl hair in ponytail. Spray the shit out of your hair. Bobby pin curls to the side of your head. Spray more hairspray.

All in all, though, it was an excellent night and though my outfit was WEIRD, I did my standard Holiday Glam and Sexy the week before. 2012 needed to be brought in with a little WEIRD and UNSETTLING.

Taken by Elly, immediately preceding hotpants removal. Happy new year!